Rebecca Moses author of A Life of Styledescribes how each of us has the potential to turn our lives into a style collage. After all, our style doesn’t end with what we wear; it blends into how we live and what we come home to every night as well.
Being conscious of how we live and doing so confidently is an expression of who we are on the inside as much as what we project to the world. In order to truly have a signature style, a strong sense of individuality must be paired with a healthy self-confidence.
Part one introduces you to where style comes from and how it can be found in your everyday.
Discovering what your signature style is is often the most difficult part, so be sure to check out part two of the series where six tips are shared to help discover exactly what stirs your inner passions. Once you know what causes you to feel giddy, what instigates an unconscious smile or what you could spend hours doing without every looking at the time, the fun part begins, which is how do you want to express yourself to the world?
Such an expression can be revealed in as many ways as there are people on this earth and can be demonstrated in all avenues of a person’s life – fashion, home decor, speech, movement, and behavior. So I’ve tried to share some examples today of how you might what to incorporate your very own signature style into your every day life. The key is to embody a style that is true to who you are, what you believe and penetrates beyond the surface.
The difference between a true style icon like Sophia Loren or Audrey Hepburn and one of the millions of beautiful women in the world is that Sophia and Audrey have left an impression. An impression that goes beyond their appearance and encompasses how they choose/chose to carry themselves, how they treated others and how they contributed to the community around them.
Signature Style is unique to you -
First impressions are a very funny thing. The trick is to accept that they exist and embrace them and more importantly, understand what you want your first impression to be of whomever you meet on any given day. Stand up tall, walk confidently, but femininely, sit like a lady, keep your stomach in and be aware of your body, face each person you are speaking to, extend a welcoming hand or kiss on the cheek, be warm, but be aware of your personal space bubble, set your boundaries (everyone’s will be different), refrain from tugging at your clothing in public or touching your hair or face too often (hints at insecurity), and when you smile, do so with sincerity.
Choose a scent, one that you love, one that is of good quality and remain loyal. Or choose one for day and one for evening. Or one for summer and one for the chillier months. But whatever scent you choose, make it your own and wear it every day.
Mireille Guiliano shares that her signature style would be described as always looking pulled together with the help of two key accessories: scarves and necklaces. But for someone else, it may be beautiful earrings and fantastic heels. Take Ines de Fressange, she always looks pulled together, but her footwear of choice is predominately a pair of flats. Whatever you gravitate towards, keep Guiliano’s four universal basics in mind when considering your wardrobe:
(1) Dress smexy (never so too much, always keep a little mystery),
(2) Invest in “good staples” – quality over quantity,
(3) No one has perfect body, so accent the positive and camouflage the rest, and
(4) Learn to stay within the personal boundaries of your style
One piece of my signature style is something that is recognisable by past and present students, family members and friends, and in one instance my boss knowing I was in the same restaurant as he was simply because he heard my laugh from across the room. Those every day idiosyncrasies that we do many times subconsciously are very often what others observe and associate with our identity, so what mannerisms do you share with the world on a daily basis? Is it your laugh, is it your eye contact, your ability to truly engage in conversation with the person who is speaking to you no matter what is going on around you, or your curiosity to get to know those around you instead of speaking about yourself? Such mannerisms can say so much.
Modern, traditional and everything in between. How you choose to adorn your home’s interior is a process that is forever evolving, but as each of us continues to learn more about ourselves and evolve into our best selves, so does our idea of what decor within our home is the most inviting. While we can’t change our bone structure, we can rearrange our furniture, add wallpaper to our walls or tear it down and paint them. The home has a plethora of possibilities for each person to express their signature style and that is what makes it so exciting.
Make Your Mark
A woman’s signature style is her ability to bring her passion to the world, to express just enough of herself with others and to not give a hoot about their opinion. This is self-confidence. This is knowing and trusting yourself. Some women will make their mark with dramatic flair – Cher and Elizabeth Taylor come to mind, and others will do it subtly, but certainly – Grace Kelly and Anna Wintour. However you decide to make your mark, be sure it is stylish and impressive woman who does it.
Accept your body. Sure, there are things you can change, but, for the most part, you've got to work with what you've got. As I said above, you are who you are. You should love yourself no matter what shape or size you are in. You are awesome. You are beautiful. You are YOU. Don't ever forget that!
Be who you are. Don't forget that your body is not YOU. You are not your body. The essence of you comes from within -- from your mind, your personality, your heart. I often find it hard to remember that I am not what I look like, but, when I do recall this, I know that there is so much more
to me than appearance.
Cultivate a healthy environment. Put yourself in a healthier place. Keeping fresh fruits and veggies around, eating healthy, and exercising are great ways to love your body (and yourself!). And don't forget about your mental health. Consider meditation to get your mind in a calmer, happier place.
Dive into self love. Okay, so you're having trouble loving yourself. You look in the mirror and think, "YUCK!" Try looking into self-help books or blogs that encourage positive thinking about life and, more specifically, about body image. Sometimes reading up on loving yourself can really help you
put it into action.
Embrace your abilities. Think about what you do well. Your body is only a part of who you are. You might be a great writer, a great athlete, an amazing parent. No matter what you are, there is more to you than your appearance. Embrace what you're good at and spend more time indulging in these activities.
Forget about comparisons. Stop comparing yourself to others. No matter what you do, you probably will not ever look like Heidi Klum or Angelina Jolie. But that's okay! You are beautiful in your own way and you will always and forever be you. Accept yourself, love yourself, and stop looking to others to see what you should look like.
Get moving! I don't know about you, but when I get in a funk thinking about the way I look or how much weight I've gained, I don't want to do anything. I just want to lay around, watching E!, thinking about how pathetic it is that I've resorted to watching E! Break the cycle. Get off the couch and
use that awesome bod!
Indulge in what you love. Don't overdo it, but every so often, let yourself eat or do whatever you wouldn't normally. I'm sure you've read this a million times, but if you completely cut yourself off from something, you're more likely to go nuts the next time it comes along so let yourself indulge every once and awhile.
Join something fun. Joining a group (or even starting a blog, which feels like joining something) can really help you with your image of yourself. You meet new people. You try new things. And, bonus!, you can have a lot of fun. Being happy in general can make you happier with how you look so check
out some groups you can join.
Keep thinking positively. Ah, my favourite! Keep thinking positively -- no matter what. So you gained 5 pounds. So you got an terrible haircut. So what. Keep thinking positively! No matter how bad you feel about yourself, there is always something good. Focus on the good, the positive, and push the negative from your mind.
Let go of your past. You were a size two in high school. Sure, that's super, but you're not in high school anymore. Remind yourself that this is where you are now. You may have been something else in the past -- thinner, prettier, more muscular -- but here you are now. In the present.
Love who you are right now.
Motivate yourself. You are the best motivation tool you have. Other people might encourage you, but only YOU can really motivate yourself. Do whatever you have to to remind yourself how great you are. Read books. Get off the couch. Talk to friends. Do whatever you have to to motivate your inner desire for self love.
Never say never. You're looking in the mirror moaning, "I will never lose this weight." You know what? You're right. With that attitude, you won't make any changes at all. You'll settle, thinking there's no hope, and you'll be unhappy. If you believe you can change something, you can. Never say never.
Open up to new ideas. Try something different. If you're not in love with your look, try something new. New clothes. New makeup. New workout routine. Experimenting with new things isn't going to solve your body image issues (that comes from within), but you can give yourself a little boost by trying out something new.
Put on your best outfit. Sometimes just a change of clothes can change your perspective. Don't stay in sweatpants all day. Don't settle for average or blah or you will feel average and blah. Dress up. Put in the effort and you'll feel a lot better about yourself.
Question your perception. You look in the mirror. You see ugly, fat, tired. But is that what's really there? As I talked about in my last post, your mind can really distort your thoughts. Sometimes what we see isn't what's really there. Keep the positive thoughts in the forefront. Avoid looking for the bad and try to keep a positive outlook.
Remember what you love. You hate your stomach, but your love your eyes. You hate your arms, but you love your thighs. Focus on the good parts of you. We often spend so much time obsessing about what we don't like about ourselves that we forget to spend time thinking about what we do love. Make a list of your favourite parts of you.
Stop judging. You are your worst critic. You are judging yourself much, much more harshly than anyone around you is. Stop it. Stop it right now. There is absolutely no good reason to critique yourself in a harsh or demeaning manner. Love yourself and the world will love you too.
Take time for you. Your body is the only one you have. Take time to pamper yourself. Do whatever you have to do to get some quality alone time. Take a bath. Take a walk. Take a vacation. Whatever you take, take some time to be alone with yourself, to rejuvenate your body (and your mind).
Understand your needs. What do you really need? What makes your body happy? When you exercise and eat healthy foods, does your body feel better? When you get plenty of rest, do you wake up refreshed? Think about what your body asks for and give it what it needs. The better your body feels, the better you will feel about it.
Vacate your mind. Sometimes we become prisoners in our own minds. Sometimes we obsess about our looks and our appearance to the point that it's unhealthy. If you're doing this, get out. Get out of your mind and free yourself.
Watch what you say. Are you always saying to your friends, "Ugh, I'm a fatass" or "This make me look fat"? If so, think about what you're saying. The more negative things you say about yourself, the more you will start to really believe what you're saying (and others might too). Try, just once, saying, "Wow, I look great!"
X-ray your desires. Think about -- I mean, really think about -- why you want that piece of chocolate cake or that new handbag. Will external things make you feel better? You bet! But the feel-good feelings are only temporary. Lasting happiness comes from within so give some thought to what you really want.
Yank yourself out of your routine. Routines can be deadly. They set us in patterns that feel old and tired, that make us feel as if we are old and tired. Some routines are good and necessary, but what routines do you have in your life that aren't good? What can you do to change them, to make them more positive experiences?
Zap any negative thoughts. Last but certainly not least! Getting rid of negative thoughts about yourself and your body is one of the most important things you can do for yourself. Whatever you need to do to do this, do it. Read books. Go on a retreat. Get rid of negative people in your life. Whatever you do, be positive about you!
Admission time I am absolutely in love with the distressed boyfriend style jeans at the moment. Are you? I just love how they look so chic when worn and styled appropriately.
The boyfriend jean is back. Boyfriend jeans should be loose but fitted across the hips, narrow and tapered in the leg and rolled to the ankle to no more than an inch above the ankle.
When purchasing make sure the wash is right for you. Choose something with a worn out look.
Find jeans that fit you correctly. Boyfriend jeans are meant to be loose and roomy, but they should still fit in the waist. Make sure they are not too baggy! Look for a straight-leg style.
Choose a pair that has a "worn-in" look. After all, the concept of "boyfriend jeans" is that you have, in theory, stolen your boyfriend's favorite pair of worn jeans and are wearing them around town--so they shouldn't look brand new!
Roll them up for a cropped look. They look great rolled and paired with everything from stilettos to flat sandals and ankle boots - a great look for any season!
Do not go overboard with the 'worn-in' look. A few holes and tears in the denim is part of the look. Find the happy medium.
Sequins - they make my heart sing. As soon as I saw this jacket yesterday in my facebook feed I knew I jut had to have it. Bonus! It was on SALE from $89.95 to $50.00. I was in love.
Sequins shout glamour to me and add a touch of class to your look. But you must remember to pair the jacket back with neutral colours and tones. I just adore the jacket with basic tees and jeans. A simple classically chic look for everyday.
Caroline is daughter of Count Bertrand de Maigret who Caroline began her modelling career in 1994, working with photographers like Mario Testino, Peter Lindbergh and Terry Richardson. Caroline has walked the catwalks for houses like CHANEL, Balenciaga and Marc Jacobs.
Every minute counts. Every minute is an opportunity to experience joy, calm, peace or fun — no matter what you’re doing, no matter where you are. The key is to be mindful.
The key is to be mindful. If there is a single secret to one-minute mindfulness, it is this: live the next sixty seconds as if your whole life depended on them, with a sense of urgency and excitement, or as if you had just arrived in a foreign land where there is nothing expected or taken for granted...
Here are five one-minute activities that you can practice every day to find the extraordinary in the ordinary:
1. Consider one small act of kindness you can do for someone.
For instance, in a minute, you can send a sweet email or give a compliment. If you don’t see anyone that day, be kind to yourself. It also helps to take a minute and remember a kind gesture from someone else that really made a difference in your life.
2. Bring a dose of creativity to your workday.
Work no doubt takes up a large portion of our days. And no doubt the tasks can quickly become tedious. Fortunately, being mindful can help you tap into a deeper sense of purpose and turn on the lamp of creativity. Strive to do one small creative thing at work or saying an affirmation, such as “The treasure of creativity is available to me at all times,” or “I let go of expectation and let creativity come to me.”
3. Find pleasantness at work.
This is one of the most profound practices. Pleasantness is an anchor that helps us centre by locating the peace that is ever-present, even when it is hidden. You can find pleasantness in a song, a sound, a scent or a blade of grass. All you have to do is scan your surroundings. You can also take one of your favourite objects to work ~ such as a photo of your loved ones ~ or having something portable with you at all times.
4. Calm anxious thoughts with a pebble.
An anxious mind can be compared to a raging river. It’s possible to find a safe place underneath the turbulent waves and you can do this by repeating a neutral word. Choose a word that doesn’t bring up any memories, associations or feelings, like the word one, peace, calm, neutral. These words are like 'pebbles' that can help you distance yourslelf from the turbulence and settle you into the deep, still water, where you can see all around clearly. When other thoughts pop up, just view them as shiny fish swimming past.
5. Gaze at the sky and moon.
Gazing at the sky and moon allows us to embrace wholeness and fosters pure awareness. As you start gazing, notice your breath and if any tension or emotions are present. Then look out to the vast sky, paying attention, moment to moment. You also can think of a specific problem or challenge you’ve been having and release it to the spaciousness of the sky as you gaze. Whatever your challenge, let it be part of the big perspective and the big wisdom that exist in nature, free from the small you that holds on to it.
Don’t let the minutes whiz by. Open your eyes, and notice the beauty surrounding you. Just one minute can make a difference in your days.
I have to say it has taken me a long time to be happy with my tummy, being in my 40's has changed my self prognosis a great deal and I am happy to proclaim that I love my tummy after all how can I not after having a gall bladder removal in my mid 20's and growing two beautiful babies I am in awe how your tummy can bounce back.
As a child I was always slim and slender and back then I guess I did not think too much of how my body looked, well it does not register any unhappiness at all. Enter year 9 and this is where my whole body shape changed and not for the best. My parents owned a milk bar/ newsagency, which my sister, brother and I just loved but ....... we all put on weight as we had access to chocolate, lollies and potato chip heaven. Then I started disliking my body and wanted to be thinner. I went through years of wanting to be thinner. This went on for years and it was not until my gall bladder operation in my mid 20's that I actually lost the weight and became to feel more comfortable with myself.
Then a few years later I fell pregnant with my first daughter Miss R and I loved and enjoyed every minute of being pregnant. I was not concerned about losing my pregnancy weight (I gained 10 kg) as it just fell off me and I only breastfed for 9 months. then in the same year as turning 30 gave birth to Miss B and this changed everything I did not bounce back as much and I only breastfed for 6 weeks. But you know what it did not really bother me I was happy and by girls were healthy and happy. I have weighed the same weight for the last 13 years and that is where I will stay.
Take a look at these beautiful people sharing their tummies over at xojane. The gorgeous Bev at Baby Mac sharing her belly here
You are you and you are beautiful. V x
Are you going to embrace your self for who your are?